Yitzchak Rabin

Yitzchak Rabin was murdered 13 years ago. This national hero has become a national symbol. "Peace." "Peace Now." At the memorial (Tel Aviv, November 9, 2008) that was really more like a rally than anything, politicians spoke, singers performed, and thousands of young people packed close into a square named after a murdered hero. I have mixed feelings. First, I have never seen such a huge rally focused on peace. The whole crowd sang shir l'shalom, jumping, dancing, clapping...But there was a sense of insincerity. As I listened to Tzipi Livni elegantly speak about a peaceful Israel, teenagers all around me joked with their friends, pushed each other around, and giggled. On the other hand, everyone participated in the rally: they SANG Hatkiva.
When Avigal's mechina spoke about it afterwards, they seemed more frustrated than moved. "It was just a political rally! People were chanting silly empty phrases, and American kids were jumping around...Where was the meaning? People spoke about Rabin and what a good man he was and how nice it is that we all came to the rally, but no one spoke about the meaning of this day. What is the significance??"
As I sang Hatikva, I was distracted. I had always sang Hatkiva and felt moved to be a part of this country, its culture, its future... But as I said it this time, I questioned my connection to Israel. Spending significant time here, I feel more separate from this country that I have before. I don't feel comfortable (at least now) with the possibility of making Aliyah. My soul is with these people as a whole, but sadly, not with the land, not with the modern culture. It is my hope that all Jews have a safe place to live, but I fail, unfortunately, to see the holiness of this land. As I had this realization, I felt some sadness.